The Song of S. Anselm's 1907

The Song S. Anselms

JHA*, 1907

Transcribed by Jemima W, March 2009

Any red writing is additional explanation / commentary on the poem.

 

I

Sing me the song of S. Anselms

-But here I must take a pause

For there’s nothing in all creation

To clutch in our savoury jaws.

 

II

Buy yet with a gurk and a gurgle

-I shall pull myself up again-

For if I go on I may juice you,

And cause some twinges of pain.

 

III

But yet – I will sing of S. Anselms-

The school of the clip and the saw,

The school of the inkpot and paper,

But costly, at threepence a score

The School did lots of woodwork

and pupils thought ink and paper was very expensive!

 

IV

The school of the milk and the porridge,

And the race for the second plate,

Where nothing is left but the china,

If you get there a moment late.

Porridge was served often and there was always good food. Yummy!

 

 

V

The school of the blue backed Ora,

My aunt & my Uncle & all-

Lydia, Britons & Corvi,

Whilst Mensa has gone to the wall.

The school looked nice if you looked up to it on a day when the sky was blue, and Latin wasn’t going well!

 

 

VI

The school of the Premiere Année,

René, & good master Bull,

Mussels, & snails, & cockles,

With Pascal to pickle you full.

 

VII

The school of the indirect question,

And Ablative Absolute,

And if there’s a slip you’re a goner!

Without any room for dispute.

 

 

VIII

The school of the saw and the roller-

“Do thirty, do forty, an hour”-

And our arms ache up to the shoulder-

We saw but we hav’nt the power.

 

IX

The school of the nets and the cricket,

And plenty of good advice:

“Stand up, keep still – you’re a coward”

“But sir, it has smitten me twice”

 

X

The school of the run after dinner: -

“Do a mile in a minute, no less”

“But I’ve got a bad pain in my tummy,

My dinner has verged on excess.”

 

XI

The school of the Prep in the evening,

When talking’s a monstrous crime;

When you’re bent to your books & your paper,

And sneezing is wasting time.

 

XII

But when you wake up in the morning,

And wash in the icy tub,

You feel you are jolly and healthy,

With smackings and plenty of grub.

 

* JHA was J. H. Appleton, one of the staff at the school in 1907 when ‘The Mag’ was written.  In Stanza V he mentions that his Aunt and Uncle are in school – so he could have been a relation to the Storrs-Fox family.